To make ourself more memorable or known, we need to be able to listen more, we also need to highlight other people strength. The other key takeaway is to be a raver, give other people complement.
The author describe how to start an interesting conversation, instead of the usual "how are you" why don't you use "what is your story", instead of "howdy" why not ask "what is the most interesting thing that happened today?". We need to be able to push the "spark" button, be unique in our approach and don't user the old boring chit chat expression.
The second chapter explores how important is the first impression. We make up our mind in the first two seconds meeting with people, whether we trust them, whether we would like to interact with them and so on.
It is important to ensure that we had a good eye contact, visibility of hands, the visibility of hands going back years to our ancestry. It is a sign of trust.
The author also introduce what she called a launch stance where you are presenting yourself with confident. Taking example on how the Ted talk presenter engage their audiences, the use the “triple hack”, which is effective use of hand gesture, voice and eye contact.
The author have some book companion in her website scienceofpeople.com/toolbox.
In the book Captivate, the science of succeeding with people, the author explain about how you should play to your strength. And play your position where you thrive. In the normal social setting for example a party, there are three area that you need to be focusing on.
The first area is Arrival area, in general you don’t want to start socialize in this area as people just arrive and start trying to find whether they know anyone, so they have very little attention to what you are takin about.
The second area is by the food, or outside the exit of the bar. This is generally the best place to socialize and start the conversation. People had settled in and ready to mingle. One thing to note, don’t talk with your mouth full. Next to the host or in their line of sight is also the best place, as they might introduce you to their guest.
The last area is the side line, bathroom, or next to the food, this is considered to be outcast area. This place is to be avoided, because usually people who hang around in this area is the one that no longer want to have any conversation.