Captivate – Chapter 7 Cracking personality

The author describe how the key to solve the people puzzle is to understand people. It goes with trying to decode their emotion. Sometime people might be saying something but he expresses a micro expression that tell us the opposite.

The micro expression is a brief intense emotional expression.

Some of the people flavors are:

openness : How approachable and open to new idea, how curious a person is

conscientiousness : approachable to get things done, self discipline

extroversion : How your approach towards people, talkativeness

agreeableness : How to approach cooperation and working with others

neuroticism : How to approach worry

The author also goes on explaining how to speed reading other people’s matrix.

Each one of the personality traits above have high or low.


  • High open people enjoy change, novelty and adventure. They are open to new idea, curious and a dreamer
  • Low open people savour tradition, routine and habits


  • High contentiousness people love to do list, organisation and schedule, attention details and making things perfect
  • Low contentiousness people embrace big idea and strategy


  • High extroversion people draw energy being with people, having social time
  • Low extroversion people crave lone time, draining when they are with people


  • High agreeableness people are empathetic and caring for others
  • Low agreeableness people are more analytical, practical and skeptical, default to no


  • High neurotic people usually have mood swings and worried
  • Low neurotic people are more calm and stable, less mood fluctuation

Depends on the compatibleness of the personality matrix you will need to either optimise or compromise.

To put this into practice, you can draw your personality diagram and compare them with your spouse.